I haven't wrote in awhile,
Can't say that much has happened
but after reading "Eat, pray, love" I'm seriously considering finding a spiritual teacher.
The whole idea of spirituality without a religion just seemed so flaky to me, something that aging hippie women bought into after some sort of trauma, so after I fell away from my religion I did not bother seeking anything out to substitute for my loss of meaning. Instead I fell into this part-scientific part-apathetic thinking about my soul.
Which is to say, I didn't really believe in a soul.
Instead, I would do things for my own 'preservation', set myself up to win earthly goods and really not knowing why I was here, except as a product of random interactions...
But this book opened up the need that all humans have to find... the divine.
It mentions the ties that bind all the devout in this world - the way they try to find connection with this higher being, the way in which all of them strive to reach a stage in which they feel a 'heavenly love' unlike any love experienced before, the emphasis on different spiritual energies one can possess...
So little by little, I'm finding and creating meaning. I am still confused - am I going for the feeling and its positive added value to my life? Or do I actually want to meet up with God?
Do I see this more as a solution to my earthly problems, or is it the end goal?
And I guess we'll see what develops.
...
Here are my basics:
To see with the eye of the heart (to take in things, not with your eyes which leads to shallow judgements, but with the heart which sees beyond- and things are much more beautiful this way).
Also 'the kingdom of God is within you' (not necessarily the book by Tolstoy, but the idea that whatever God is, it exists deep down inside of you - which can be realized or ignored. Whatever you want can spring from within you - though not being from YOU, but from something that is connected to everything in this world)
this as far as I am.
I'm not even sure if I believe God to exactly be this holiest of holy male figure who is the creator of this universe.
At this point, it's more of a God is goodness, a beautiful and pure goodness...
But it's form, I don't know. Can I pray to it? Or do I pray for it to come. Is it a being or feeling/understanding.
...
Anyway, I'm just at the beginning... we'll see what happens!
Can't say that much has happened
but after reading "Eat, pray, love" I'm seriously considering finding a spiritual teacher.
The whole idea of spirituality without a religion just seemed so flaky to me, something that aging hippie women bought into after some sort of trauma, so after I fell away from my religion I did not bother seeking anything out to substitute for my loss of meaning. Instead I fell into this part-scientific part-apathetic thinking about my soul.
Which is to say, I didn't really believe in a soul.
Instead, I would do things for my own 'preservation', set myself up to win earthly goods and really not knowing why I was here, except as a product of random interactions...
But this book opened up the need that all humans have to find... the divine.
It mentions the ties that bind all the devout in this world - the way they try to find connection with this higher being, the way in which all of them strive to reach a stage in which they feel a 'heavenly love' unlike any love experienced before, the emphasis on different spiritual energies one can possess...
So little by little, I'm finding and creating meaning. I am still confused - am I going for the feeling and its positive added value to my life? Or do I actually want to meet up with God?
Do I see this more as a solution to my earthly problems, or is it the end goal?
And I guess we'll see what develops.
...
Here are my basics:
To see with the eye of the heart (to take in things, not with your eyes which leads to shallow judgements, but with the heart which sees beyond- and things are much more beautiful this way).
Also 'the kingdom of God is within you' (not necessarily the book by Tolstoy, but the idea that whatever God is, it exists deep down inside of you - which can be realized or ignored. Whatever you want can spring from within you - though not being from YOU, but from something that is connected to everything in this world)
this as far as I am.
I'm not even sure if I believe God to exactly be this holiest of holy male figure who is the creator of this universe.
At this point, it's more of a God is goodness, a beautiful and pure goodness...
But it's form, I don't know. Can I pray to it? Or do I pray for it to come. Is it a being or feeling/understanding.
...
Anyway, I'm just at the beginning... we'll see what happens!
2 comments:
Hey Jane! Its been a while, glad to hear you are coming camping with us.
As for a spiritual leader, I recommend going to a Sunday 7PM Catholic mass at St Jarome, and listen to Father Jim. He was the coolest priest I have ever met, and was the only spiritual leader who I actually loved hearing. He's also the only priest, to combine, science, school, politics and just about everything else in his sermons. Give him a shot, he's super nice, and by far one of the most interesting lecturers UW has to offer.
I don't really get spirituality. I think this is an area for which we have a big lack of properly descriptive language, and thus we all misunderstand each other and end up "believing" different things.
Though, sometimes I wonder if I'm broken because I seem to be the only one who doesn't get spirituality. Eh.
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